More Tales of Paula

Paula excelled herself today – and we haven’t even set off on our holidays!

Her opening trick of the day was to pinch my keys. I always leave them on top of the fridge but yesterday I had left them on the table which is Paula height – not whippet or dog height but Paula height! After much searching I eventually found them in the grass where she had been having a little taste.

I’m very much a ‘last minute’ person and had gone into Roscommon to pay a few bills and buy one or two bits. So, as I always do, I left Paula curled up on the passenger seat. I swear I was only away from the car for 45 seconds before I realised that I had left my phone in the car (again). I dashed back to find that Paula was happily adapting the phone to her own specifications – yes, another one! Fortunately though, I had just got to her in time to rescue it before it became un-useable. But the screen is not too bright and the buttons are pitted with her teeth marks.

That’s not all – I needed to go into another shop so I checked to make sure there was nothing that she could destroy and off I went. I was away for about 10 minutes and when I returned, Paula had removed the button from the end of my windscreen wiper switch. As it was only a little chewed I took it off her and pushed it back into place. That’s when the fun started!

I settled myself into the car, put my seatbelt on; then I switched the engine on. I got the shock of my life as all the wipers (back and front) started going on ‘very fast’ mode, the window washer pumped water continuously onto the windscreen and I was – apparently –  going to turn left, according to the flashing indicator. Now, I know it doesn’t sound too bad, but as I wasn’t expecting it, it really took me by surprise and my brain refused to tell me what to do! The other shoppers in the car park must have thought I was a mad woman – giving my windscreen the best wash it had ever had. After a few seconds of slight panic, not knowing which buttons to press, my brain unscrambled and I turned off the ignition – aren’t I smart!

I sat there for a while trying to remove the button that my little darling had chewed but, of course, it’s never that simple. I had done a good job putting it back! So, after lots of beeping of the horn (by accident and much to the surprise of passers by) I managed to remove the button, straightened it and replaced it – problem solved. But not until I had wondered how long the water would last in the windscreen washer if I had to drive home washing the windscreen all the way.

The result of today’s little episode is that I went to my son’s house and picked up a dog guard that I left in his kennels. Sadly, Paula has shot herself in the foot – she will be in the back of the car when I am on the ferry – who knows what my car would look like if I leave her on the passenger seat as I originally intended!